


Thank Geoff

by thePetetoherPatrick



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: M/M, No RT AU, Ryan is a mailman, idk how to tag this, just kinda intense making out or whatever, there's not really smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-15
Updated: 2016-05-15
Packaged: 2018-06-08 12:21:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6854443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thePetetoherPatrick/pseuds/thePetetoherPatrick
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Another Prompt Piece:<br/>Person A buys something on the internet to be delivered to their house, Person B, who is a postman, then looks at the information of where the thing is supposed to be delivered and notices that they live pretty close to Person A and decides to deliver it themselves on their way home. Person A hears a knock on their door and when they open Person B stands there with the thing and stutters because Person A was a lot hotter than what they had thought.<br/>courtesy of otpmusings.tumblr.com</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thank Geoff

“Hey, Ry, this is your load today.” Geoff says gruffly pointing to two bags of letters and packages. I nod and look over the paperwork in front of me. I shake my head and grab the two bags. I put the bag I know I won’t need till later on the back of my bike and sling the strap of the other over my head. Geoff waves at me as he climbs into his car with his. He’s got to go farther away to deliver his bunch even though it’s smaller. He does the outskirts of the city.

I push off and pedal out into the city. I already know my first stop is the Tuggey Pet Store. I pull up and Lindsay is waiting outside for me. She’s all smiles as I hand her the package of god knows what, and a couple envelopes. I get saddled with mostly businesses and some apartment buildings. “Catnip again?” I ask.

She laughs. “No, some new treats for the hamsters this time.” she waves and heads back into her store. I shake my head and push off again. I look at the next address on the list. Ray Narvaez Jr. Probably the latest video game. I pull up to his apartment and ring the bell. No answer as usual so I leave it on his porch. I’ve only seen him a few times, he’s always a smartass but is pretty laid back.

I pass Jack on my way around the corner to Meg’s studio. He waves as he tends to the flowers and assorted plants outside his shop. I wave back. I get off the bike as I pull up to the Studio. “Well Haywood, what’ve you got for me today?” The tiny woman bounces towards me as I step in the door, her purple ringlets hitting her shoulders with each stride.

“Haven’t the foggiest idea Turney, you’ve got three small packages and some bills from the look of it.” I hand her the envelopes and dig the three boxes out of the bag. I hand them to her and she smiles.

“Oh good, new paints, brushes, and those pastels Gavin wanted me to try out.” She smiles at the package I can only assume is the pastels.

“That boy ask you out yet?” I ask as I fix my hat.

“No, I don’t think he’s actually into me, he’s just nice.” She shrugs, I’ve been listening to her talk about him and his shenanigans for about three years now. It’s apparent that he’s got a massive crush on her and she likes him but he’s apparently too much of a chicken shit to ask her out. I shake my head as I head back out to my bike.

I make all my usual stops at different apartments and a few other businesses. One stop happens to be Geoff’s apartment with a couple letters for his wife, Griffon. She's outside on her ground floor patio working on one of her chainsaw carvings when I pull up. I cautiously approach. Luckily she notices me and shuts the chainsaw off. I hold out the letters to her and she takes them with a smile.

“Thank you Ryan.” she says. “Hold on a second, I got something for you.” She slips inside through the patio door. She comes back a few seconds later with a gift bag. “I didn't get a   
chance to give you this on your birthday.” She hands me the bag.

I open it to see a small wood carving. One of her pieces. I pull it out to see that it's a Viking styled warrior and a bear. It's beautiful. “Thanks Grif, I love it.” I smile and put it into the bag over my shoulder. I look at the empty one on the back of my bike. I've only got one more stop before I can go home. “I'll talk to you later.” She nods and smiles.

I pull away from her place and head to my last stop. I pull the letters and package out of my bag and open the mailbox. Something on the tag for the package catches my attention. The name and address are wrong. The address isn't even in my route. For fuck sakes Geoff. I look at the address again. That's that house across from the small one I rent. The guy that owns it just rented it out last month but I've never seen who rented it. I roll my eyes and decide to finish putting letters in the mailbox and deliver the stupid package when I get home.

I head back to the post office to drop off my paperwork. Geoff is already sitting at the desk looking over several papers. "How'd it go?" He asks without looking up.

"Good but you fucked up." I hang up the bags and pull the package out of the one. I hold it up. 

"This one ain't on my route."

He looks up at it. "Oh, whose is it on?"

"Yours actually." I sigh. "It's fine though cause it's across the street from my place so I'll just drop it off on my way home."

"Shit, well sorry about that and thanks." He scratches at the scruff along his neck. "Did Grif give you your birthday present?"

"Yeah she did. I like it, she's really good." I smile and then remember to pull it out of the bag too. I hand him my paperwork. "Gonna head home, drop off this package and hope whoever this M. Jones isn't an asshole about it." I shrug before picking up the box and my gift.

"You haven't seen your neighbour?" Geoff chuckles. I shake my head and shrug.

"They moved in about a month ago and I haven't seen them yet." He continues to grin.

"What's the address again?" He asks and I tilt the box so he can see. He immediately starts laughing like a maniac. "Yeah, you can have fun with that."

My face drops. Oh god, how bad does a person have to be before Geoff warns you about them. Maybe it's some grumpy old woman. That'd explain why I haven't seen them at all in the last month. I turn away from Geoff and his laughing fit and head out the door. I put the box and gift bag in the basket on the back of my bike and strap them in. I pedal to the nearest bus stop and wait. When the bus pulls up the driver opens the door and I'm greeted by Gus. He's the grumpiest bus driver but he's the only one I actually like enough to talk to. I get on with my bike and drop my change in the bucket same as always. He chats about nothing in particular the whole way out to the suburbs. The news mostly. When I get off the bus I pedal four blocks to my house. I change and shower quickly. Being smelly and a mess from work won't do any favours if I'm dealing with someone who's disagreeable.

I walk across the street to the address written on the package and knock on the door gently. No doorbell. Most older ladies have doorbells. I wait for a minute and knock again, a little bit louder this time. I hear movement and a voice with an accent cursing.

"Can I fucking help you?" The voice says as the door opens. I'm dumbfounded by the man standing in front of me. He's obviously younger than me. He's not tall either. His hair is a curly mop of mahogany and he's got freckles framing his eyes. He's not scrawny, but fit, dressed in a Mario shirt and worn jeans with no socks. I'm sure I look like an idiot standing there gawking.   
"Oi! I said can I fucking help you buddy?" He asks again.

"Yeah...uh...sorry. I uh.....I'm.....I am..." I stumble over my words. Rendered unable to speak for some cursed reason, not that that's anything new for me.

"Spit it out asshole." He says, his accent clouding his words a bit. It's an accent I know I've heard before, but I can't place it.

"Sorry, I...." I take a deep breath. "I'm a post worker, I deliver mail but usually in the city center. My supervisor fucked up and I ended up with your mail in my bag and when I saw the address I figured I'd just drop it off when I got home because I live across the street." I ramble on and he rolls his eyes.

"Well where is it then?" He demands. Jersey, I realize, he's from Jersey, that's what that accent is.

I hold out the box and his face lights up and then falls again. He takes it and examines it. He turns and sets it on the table in the hall. "Get in here." He snaps. I cautiously step inside and close the door. He pulls at the tape to no avail so I pull my pocket knife out and hold it out to him. He eyes me before accepting it and carefully opening the box. He sets the knife on the table and digs into the package. "It's finally here."

"What is?" I dare to ask. He holds up a green and brown canvas bag that's about big enough for a laptop. It's got a long sturdy strap and a gold symbol on it. I raise an eyebrow and he looks at me in utter shock.

"Dude, it's Zelda. It's for my laptop and notebooks and stuff." He says like I should have known. Right, I do remember playing Zelda once. It was an alright game.

"You in school then?" I ask.

"What? No, for work dumbass. I'm a teaching assistant." He rolls his eyes. "I'm 27*, I graduated college a more than a few years ago."

"You? Around kids?" I ask trying to hold back the laugh.

"Yeah, why the fuck not?" He frowns, "kids happen to love me."

"You do swear quite a lot. I'm surprised they let you around kids." I say, resigning to the fact that inevitability he'll take offense to anything I say at this point.

"I do know how to filter my language around kids. I usually catch myself if I slip up. I'm not a total fucking idiot." He says indignantly.

"I see." I look around. "Well you've got your man purse, I'm going home now." I say and watch his face turn red.

"Man purse!" He growls. "You watch your tongue or I'll make sure to aim this 'man purse' at your head on your way out."

I chuckle and make my escape before he can actually make good on that threat.

~~~

I go to open my mail that Geoff had left on my porch only to realize I forgot my pocket knife at that guy's house. I grab a knife from the kitchen. I'll go back tomorrow and hope he's cooled down some by then.

~~~

I knock on the door and am immediately greeted by the guy, whose hair is somehow even more messy than it already was. He's in his pjs still, just his pants with no shirt, though admittedly it is only 5am.

"What the fuck do you want? I'm trying to make coffee and get ready for work." He grumbles groggily. I hold out a to go cup of coffee.

"I didn't know what you take in your coffee so it's black but I figured I'd better have some kind of peace offering if I was going to bother you in the morning." He eyes me and takes the coffee and drinks some of it. I guess he takes his coffee black, not surprised somehow. "I forgot my pocket knife here yesterday."

He sighs and motions for me to come in. I step inside once again. He wanders off into the house somewhere and comes back with my knife and hands it to me. Only then do I see the tattoos on his arms. A couple on his forearms and one on his shoulder just above the bicep. All of them look video game or nerd culture related. I take the knife and shove it in my pocket.

"Thanks." I mutter.

"Yeah whatever, thanks for the coffee." He holds up the cup still in his hand.

"I'd better go and let you get ready for work." I turn to leave.

"Well I'm making toaster waffles for breakfast if your wanna hang around for that." He says but his face looks unsure.

"I...." I start to stutter again and he rolls his eyes and without an ounce of fear grabs hold of my wrist and hauls me into the kitchen.

"You've really got a way with words man, they're toaster waffles, they require no effort to make and I've got plenty of them." He sighs as he pulls the box out of the freezer. He throws 4 in the toaster and puts down the levers. "Never caught your name."

"Ryan," I say not really paying attention, "my name is Ryan."

"Huh, well I'm Michael." He says watching the toaster. Michael, that's what the M is. Michael Jones then. I nod in acknowledgement, that I actually heard him. The toaster pops and he grabs a couple of plates from the cupboard. He tosses two waffles on each and sets the on the breakfast bar. I go to start eating but he slaps my hand. He goes into the fridge and pulls out a jar of what looks like strawberry simple syrup. He grabs a spoon and pours some over the waffles. Making sure to get some of the chunks of strawberries. I smile and start eating.  
He stands across from me and eats his own. When we finish our breakfast he takes the dishes and rinses them before putting them in the dishwasher.

"Thanks for breakfast." I say gently. He nods.

"Well you had the decency to bring me a coffee for bugging me this early in the morning.   
Toaster waffles was the least I could do." He shrugs.

"I'd best let you get ready for work now." I step down off the stool. He nods and shows me to the door. "Have a good day Michael."

"Yeah sure, you too Ryan." He laughs.

~~~

I am awoken from my afternoon nap on the couch a week later by someone pounding on the door. I groggily walk to the front door and open it to find Michael standing there looking quite distraught.

"Hey, what's up?" I ask leaning against the door frame, not totally awake yet.

"Ryan, I really hate to ask this of you but I'm freaked out and don't know anyone else around here." He looks more and more distressed. I snap to attention, something is obviously wrong.

"What do you need?" I ask.

"I just came home and my front door is open, I think someone broke in and I'm not a particularly big human being so I'm not real keen on going in there by myself in case there's someone in there still." He manages to say.

"Alright calm down and hold on a second." I turn around and reach into the living room. I grab the baseball bat leaning against the wall. "Alright let's go see if your house your house has been invaded." He nods and follows me across the street. His door actually is open and looks like it was forcibly made so. I push it open, holding my bat up as Michael watches from a careful distance. I walk down the hall looking through the open concept house. I don't see anything so I turn around and climb the stairs. I check the master bedroom and the smaller bedroom made into an office. Nothing. I check the bathroom. Still nothing. I walk down the stairs to find Michael still waiting by the door.

"All clear. Not a robber in sight. Now you can check if anything is missing. I'll stick around till you're done." I motion for him to go ahead. He wanders around the whole house, checking everything, but doesn't seem to find anything missing or out of place.

"Thank you for doing that." He says, hanging his head in shame. I take another look at the door. It's intact and upon closer examination I realize it wasn't kicked in. A screw gave out. His face falls further when I point this out.

"I'll go get a new screw and see if I can't fix it for you." I say smiling. He shrugs.

"I've got some tools and screws in the closet." He says before going to get them. He hands them to me and I pry the broken and rusted screw out and replace it. I close the door and it stays. He looks relieved but ashamed. "Hey, it's better that you got back up because what if it had been kicked in and someone was here?" I run my hand over his shoulder soothingly. "It's better that you assumed the worst and asked for help rather than get hurt end up in the hospital or worse."

He sighs and nods in resignation. I study him for a second and pull him into a tight hug. He doesn't protest or complain, he wraps his arms around my torso and nestles his face into my   
chest.

"Thank you Ryan." He mumbles. I rest my chin on his head and just hold him until he calms down. After a couple of minutes he let's go of me and steps back. "Sorry about all of this."

"Am I really the only person you know around here that you thought to come to for help?" I ask while he stands there fidgeting with his hands. He nods. "You've been here over a month, surely you've made some friends." He shakes his head.

"You're the only person outside of work that I've really been around. I've tried to go out and make friends but the only person other than you I've had even remotely spoken to is this British guy named Gavin that I met at a game store." He looks at his feet.

"Oh you've met him have you?" I chuckle. He looks at me curiously. "I doubt there are many British guys named Gavin around here so it's pretty much gotta be who I'm thinking of. He's got a massive crush on this girl named Meg. She has an art studio downtown, I see her pretty much every day."

"Yeah he mentioned someone named Meg." He smiles faintly. "It also helps that you're like six foot of scary looking muscular motherfucker." He chuckles. "No bad guy would dare fuck with you."

I laugh and shake my head. "Well I'm making barbecue for dinner. You want to come over?" I ask.

"You cook?" He cocks an eyebrow.

"You're damn right I do." I snicker.

"Yeah sure, sounds good, want me to bring anything?"

"Nah, it's all good." I shrug. I've got a salad on standby in the fridge. All I have to do is add dressing and cook the steak. I motion for him to come with me as I head for the door. He follows quietly. We get to my house and I let him in. He looks around curiously. I beeline for the kitchen, he takes his time to follow. I open the patio door and start the barbecue. He stands in the kitchen for a minute.

"Want me to help with anything?" He asks.

"If you want you can grab the bowl off the top shelf in the fridge and the bottle of dressing beside it and mix the dressing into the salad." I call from outside as I cook the steak. It's just one but it's big enough I can cut it in half to share with him. I hear him moving around, doing what he was told to. Once the steak is cooked I turn the barbecue off and head back inside. I grab two plates and serve dinner. I grab forks and then open the fridge. "Want a diet Coke?" I offer but he wrinkles up his nose.

"What the fuck man? Diet Coke?" He laughs. I resist the urge to stick my tongue out at him.

"What? I happen to like it. Fine I've got Sprite too somewhere in here." I look in the fridge and find it behind my Coke.

"Sprite sounds better than Diet Coke." He shrugs. I grab our drinks and take everything to the small dining room table. We sit and eat in relative silence. When we finish I take the dishes out to the kitchen and start washing them. He picks up the tea towel and dries them and puts them away as I go. "Thanks for dinner." He says.

"Not a big deal." I shrug as he puts away the last dish.

"For most people it would be." He says. I shrug and stand there awkwardly. I watch him as he puts the towel away. I'm immensely glad he didn't get hurt today, and in my head I can't really figure out why I feel that way. I get lost in my head trying to figure it out and don't notice that he's standing there watching me.

At some point he's no longer just watching me and moves toward me but I don't pick up on it till I feel his hand on the back of my neck, pulling my head down to his level, and his lips pressed against mine. I react automatically, grabbing hold of his hips. Pulling him towards me and kissing him back, deepening the kiss. His lips are soft and he tastes good. He moans as I push my tongue into his mouth, playing it against his. He tangles his hand into my hair, gripping tightly like it's anchoring him but not hurting me. I move my hand from his hip to the small of his back, holding him firmly in place while my other hand brushes up from his hip, pushing his shirt up and resting on his ribcage. He breaks the kiss, gasping for air, and resting his forehead against mine. I don't move an inch, just letting him breath and catching my own breath. He's the first to move. He steps toward me, pressing his body firmly against mine making my lean against the counter. He kisses me again, biting at my lower lip. I growl into it and feel his whole body shudder at the sound. He pulls back and looks me in the eye, making sure it wasn't a threatening or warning growl. I kiss him again and he rolls his hips forward against mine. This time I break the kiss, letting go of him and standing up straight so he can no longer reach my face. He looks up at me in confusion.

"Why?" Is all he says.

"Slow down, I am old fashioned I guess, but I'd rather date someone for a while before things get too crazy." I say before he can get upset at me for stopping.

"So you're saying you want to date me?" He smiles widely. I roll my eyes at him.

"Yes, Michael, if that's alright with you." I sigh.

"That is absolutely more than alright with me." He leans into me and I instinctively hug him.

"You'll have to remind me to thank Geoff, if he hadn't have fucked up I probably wouldn't have met you." I smile down at him and he chuckles. "My name, by the way is James. Ryan is my middle name but I prefer it to James." I mutter, realizing that he'll eventually find out and it'd be easier if he knows right off the bat.

"James Ryan Haywood." He mumbles to himself. "Well, Ryan, I'm infinitely glad your supervisor fucked up and I'd like to meet him someday so I can thank him as well."


End file.
